You need very little personal information about someone in order to find out everything about them. It is amazing what people will unwittingly reveal to you through a series of conversations or email exchanges. While the digital dating scene is mostly a fun experience and can lead to long lasting relationships, remember to have fun AND play it safe.

* Think carefully before giving out personal information such as your last name, place of work, where you attended or attend school, your address or city, names of your parents or children, your daily routine, your phone number. If someone pressures you for such information, move on and ignore that person.
Alternative: Make an agreement up front with your potential partner that you will both use nicknames to address one another and not reveal any personal identifying information until it is deemed agreeable by both of you. Instead of giving out phone numbers to talk via voice, hook up online and chat via voice. See The Digital Date area for more information about voice chat online.

* Don't use your regular email address.
Alternative: Set up a free email account specifically for communicating with potentinal online romances. I recommend Hotmail. Hotmail lets you filter incoming email by keywords in the subject or by email addresses, so it is easy to filter out spam and to block email from potentials who are creepy. Make sure that you do NOT provide true information when signing up for a free email account, and make sure you opt out of the email server's member directory if you do provide identifying information.

* Don't give out your personal Instant Message ID or ICQ number to people.
Alternative: Set up a free Instant Message account or ICQ account to give to potential online romances. Make sure that you do not provide any personal identifying information associated with your Instant Message or ICQ account. You can get free instant messaging software from AOL, Yahoo!, or MSN.

* Trust your instincts. If you have a feeling that someone isn't who they represent themself to be, believe yourself and discontinue communicating with the person.

* Don't reply to emails or instant messages that are lewd or make you feel uncomfortable.
Alternative: IGNORE the person. Block the person's email address or instant message ID so they cannot contact you. Don't waste your time on that loser when you could be going through emails and instant messages from positive potential mates.

* For the first real, in person date don't meet in private. If you are to the point in your online relationship that the two of you want to meet in person, do so in a safe public place where you both feel comfortable.
Ideas: Meet at the movies, a coffee shop, restaurant, sporting event, festival, fair, amusement park, or the like. Don't plan an entire day together, allot a few hours for the date so no one feels obligated further. Take your own method of transporation and do not travel together in the same car. Maybe next time she or he can pick you up for the date, but for now, why rush a good thing and endanger yourself? If you are flying out of state or out of the country, arrange your own travel plans. Book your own hotel room and rental car so you are dependant upon yourself and not a total stranger. Once you are in the same city as the person, follow the general guidelines for meeting for the first time mentioned above.

* Take action if you are being harassed, threatened, or if someone online is scaring you via email or instant messages.
Courses of Action: If it is via email, contact the sender's email administrator and report him or her. Decline all contact with the person by adding him or her to your email and instant messag blocking features. Do not congregate in chatrooms where the person hangs out. Contact your local police department if necessary.

* Investigate. Once you have obtained some personal information you can obtain criminal and civil records, as well as a plethora of other information about the person. I advise you do this if you are considering entering a serious relationship with your online partner and you have any suspicions... but if you have suspicions, why are thinking of entering a serious relationship with the person anyway?
How: Look in your yellow pages and contact a private investigator in your area. Or, do a search online for private investigators or information brokers.

If you've decided to take the plunge and try online dating, here are your top 10 tips for keeping it safe. Whether you decide to correspond online or meet members offline, please use sound judgment and be responsible for your conduct. In both the virtual and real worlds, common sense is your best defence.

1. START SLOWLY Watch out for anyone who seems too good to be true. Begin by communicating solely via Match.com, MSN Messenger or email, and look for odd behaviour or inconsistencies. The person at the other end may not be who or what he or she says they are. Trust your instincts. If anything makes you uncomfortable, walk away for your own safety and protection.

2. GUARD YOUR ANONYMITY All correspondence between Match.com members takes place through their double-blind system, ensuring your true identity is protected until you decide to reveal it. Never include your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work or any other identifying information in your free member profile or initial messages. When corresponding with another Match.com member, turn off your email signature file. Stop communicating with anyone who pressures you for personal information or attempts in any way to trick you into revealing it.

3. USE CAUTION & COMMON SENSE Careful, thoughtful decisions generally produce better results. Take all the time you need to convince yourself that they are a trustworthy person and pay careful attention along the way. If you suspect someone is lying, he or she probably is, so act accordingly. Be responsible about romance, and don’t fall in love at the click of a mouse. Don’t become prematurely intimate with someone, even if only online. If you mutually decide to cross the point of no return, be smart and protect yourself.

4. ASK FOR A PHOTO A photo will give you a good idea of the person's appearance, which can be helpful in forming a "gut feeling". If possible, try to see several images of someone in various settings - casual, formal, indoor and outdoors etc. If all you hear are excuses about why you can't see a photo, consider that he or she has something to hide.

5. CHAT ON THE PHONE A phone call can reveal a lot about a person’s communication and social skills. Consider your security and don't reveal your personal phone number to a stranger. Try a mobile phone number instead or use 141 to prevent your phone number from being transmitted. Only give out your phone number when you feel completely comfortable.

6. MEET WHEN YOU'RE READY The beauty of meeting and getting to know each other online is that you can collect information gradually, later choosing whether to pursue the relationship in the offline world. You are never obliged to meet anyone, regardless of your level of online intimacy. And even if you do decide to meet, you can always change your mind. It’s possible that your decision to keep the relationship at the anonymous level is based on a hunch that you can’t logically explain. Trust yourself and go with your instincts.

7. WATCH FOR WARNING SIGNS Pay attention to displays of anger, intense frustration or attempts to pressure or control you. Acting in a passive-aggressive manner, making demeaning or disrespectful comments or any physically inappropriate behaviour are all warning signs. You should be concerned if your date exhibits any of the following behaviour without an acceptable explanation: Gives inconsistent information about age, interests, appearance, marital status, profession, employment, etc. Refuses to speak to you on the phone after establishing ongoing, online intimacy or fails to give direct answers to direct questions. Appears significantly different in person from his or her online persona or never introduces you to friends, colleagues or family members.

8. MEET SOMEWHERE SAFE When you choose to meet offline, always tell a friend where you are going and when you will return. Leave your date’s name and telephone number with your friend. Never arrange for your date to pick you up at home. Provide your own transportation, meet in a public place at a time when there will be plenty of people around, and when the date is over, leave on your own. A familiar restaurant or café, at a time when a lot of other people will be present, is often a good choice. If you decide to move to another location, take your own car. When the timing is appropriate, thank your date for getting together and say goodbye.

9. USE EXTRA CAUTION IN NEW PLACES
If you are arriving from another part of the country, arrange your own transport and hotel room and don't disclose the name of your hotel. Call your date from the hotel or meet at an agreed location. If the location seems inappropriate or unsafe, go back to your hotel. Try to contact your date at that location or leave a message on their answerphone. Always make sure a friend or family member knows your plans and has your contact information. And if possible, carry a mobile phone at all times.

10. GET YOURSELF OUT OF A JAM
Never do anything you feel unsure about. If you are in any way afraid of your date, use your best judgment to diffuse the situation and leave as quickly as possible. Excuse yourself long enough to call a friend for advice, ask someone else at the scene for help or slip out the back door and drive away. If you feel you're in danger, call the police; it’s always better to be safe than sorry. Never worry or feel embarrassed about your behaviour; your safety is much more important than one person’s opinion of you.